"How Can I Forgive When It Hurts So Much?"

People teach their children to hit back. However do they teach them to forgive?

Someone recently asked me about forgiveness. I told her to forgive whomever had wronged her. I explained that holding on to hatred, bitterness or animosity only fills a person with negative energy. A person can only hold so much until he or she explodes.

Forgiveness didn't always come so easy for me. It wasn't easy to give or to ask for. For a long time I thought that if I were to forgive someone I would be showing a sign of weakness. I actually felt that malevolence made me strong. At the same time I knew that asking for forgiveness meant admitting I was wrong. And more so than wanting to seem right I wanted to seem like I didn't care.

All the while I was too ignorant to realize that I was doing a disservice to myself. But one day my grandmother saw me down and out. She didn't ask me what was wrong. She simply said forgive him. Don't hold any ill will towards him. She went on to say you reap what you sow. I thought she meant he would get what he deserved. Now I understand that she was talking about me. If I sat there holding on to negativity and refusing to forgive then that was what I was going to get back. I had to forgive those who did me wrong to at the very least help myself move forward.

Same thing with asking for forgiveness. How was I every to learn from my mistakes and grow as a person if I refused to look at my mistakes for what they were and ask for forgiveness? Hold on to it and you could end up hating yourself.

I have had to ask myself for forgiveness. I have had to ask the LORD for forgiveness. For me this had been a challenge. When you ask someone to forgive you or forgive someone it must be done with sincerity. You may be able to fool your friends, family, boss, coworkers but you cannot fool yourself or the LORD.

Start teaching the young people the strength of a forgiving heart. Thank GOD for His Son my Savior Jesus Christ. He died so that my sins would be forgiven and my soul saved. How could I in my right mind refuse to give what Jesus gave to me so freely.

So no matter what the circumstance please search your heart to ask for forgiveness. Search your heart to provide it as well. Remember once it is done it is done. No need to rehash. At the same time don't be foolish. Walk away from things that are detrimental to your well being.

And always remember when GOD is for you who can be against you.

~Andrea D. Kelly

Hot Topic Response

"I truly like what you wrote and you are truly blessed."

Hot Topic Response

Proverbs 11:30 The fruit of the righteous is the tree of life; and he that winneth souls is wise. ENOUGH SAID.

I THINK NOT!!!

Last week I had a conversation with someone about accomplishments. I found myself thinking what did I accomplished in 2009 and in life overall. At first I was looking at myself in the worldly sense. Have I accomplished what society says I should have by 38 yrs old? Am I to look at what others have done with their lives and use that as my par or rule of thumb? Am I to live up to someone else's expectations?

I THINK NOT!!!

Can I tell all of you judgemental people what I have accomplished? I have survived 4 major surgeries, the removal of 7 organs and several tumors, a brain aneurysm, menopause at 35, and a major heart attack. I survived these things because GOD granted me His Grace. My life has been a testimony of how true God is, how real He is, how loving He is. Thank you LORD for using me. Use me all day everyday. Thank you for leading me into a life of righteousness and away from a life of self righteousness.

I know people who make six figures but aren't nearly as blessed as I am. I know people who have swarms of "friends" who aren't nearly as blessed as I am. However these are the folks who look at me and judge.

If you find yourself in a similar situation, lean on GOD. Listen to His Word. Set you sites and goals on His Will being done in your life. If I can accomplish what He wants me to, if I can be used by Him to spread His word, if I can be used as a vessel to bless people and lead them to Jesus Christ what more need I accomplish?

~Andrea D. Kelly

Sound Off

Send a message to Andrea Kelly via Facebook or email sistatosistabtdt@yahoo.com

Black Comedy

I was listening to a Black stand up comic the other night. He was absolutely hilarious. However as I sat there laughing a part of me said, "Hmm! If this were a white comedian talking about black folks we'd call in Al Sharpton." Isn't that a double standard? We can talk about white folks but they can't talk about us. Many black folks feel this way. It's almost like the white man owes us. He's done enough so this is our pay back.

"Nappy headed hos" was a racially motivated joke. I did not like it. However is joking the white man being dumb and slow for trying to tame while animals any different?

I don't want anyone calling me out of my name. Then why do I have the right to do so because some one's ancestor was a slave owner (maybe)

Hot Topic Response - Tiger Woods

1. "I agree my sista. The only difference between Tiger and others is that he got caught. I believe that he is really sorry for his actions"
2. "I don't think we really know because there are two sides of all things. It is hard to live in the public eye. But I have met the guy and he is such close of person . . . did an opening for a restaurant he used to own."

1. "Let ' THEM ' be!! It's time for healing, God has it from here......"

TIGER WOODS

I watched and listened closely to Tiger Woods today. He has apologized. "He who is without sin, cast the first stone." Let Tiger and his family handle their issues.

HOT TOPIC OF THE WEEK

Does Sarah Palin represent you? Would you vote for her if she were to run in the 2012 election? Why? Why not?

HOT TOPIC OF THE WEEK 01-20-10

Last week's hot topic was about dating men with several children. More women said they would than said they would not. This made me curious. Are single men without children hard to find? Are single women tired of being single? What if he was a good man and father but it meant hundreds of dollars would leave his pocket and potentially your home every month?

Sound off at sistatosistabtdt@yahoo.com or send a message via Facebook to Andrea Kelly

Hot Topic Response

"I would and have dated a man with 3+ children. My husband actually has 3 children , two different mothers. He is an excellent father to his children and that is very important. If he isn't treating the children he has now good what happens if you get pregnant by him? The number of children maybe important but what is more important is the role that the man is playing in these children's lives."